Records of a Distant Age

“A long time ago, in the Before Times, music was sold on vinyl record albums. They were large and unwieldy and pretty fragile, but there are people who still prefer them to this very day. Artists would often release singles, just one song–well, two songs, the single on the A side and another song on the other side, the B side. But that’s not important. Anyway, full-length albums were these large 12 inch squares–I mean, the actual album was a circle, but the album sleeve was a square. And singles were smaller, 7 inches. But sometimes the artist or producer or some DJ would remix a single and make it longer for dancing purposes. These were released on records the same size as full-length albums, 12 inches. Although I don’t know why everyone says they’re 12 inches instead of a foot. Except now that I say it out loud, ‘foot-long dance remix’ sounds weird, so maybe it’s for the best that no one has ever called them that.”

— me, explaining “12-inch dance remix” to a younger coworker

(Referring to older technology as being from “the Before Times” is something I yoinked from Wil Wheaton. I’m sure he doesn’t mind. I mean, I’m giving him credit, so it’s all good, right?)